


When she met him

by GeoLinden



Category: Captain America (Comics), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Winter Soldier (Comics)
Genre: 50s, AU, F/M, Hydra (Marvel), Multi, Post-Captain America: The First Avenger, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes, alternative universe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-08
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-14 20:08:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29922171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GeoLinden/pseuds/GeoLinden
Summary: Little was known about Bucky Barnes’ life under the torment of HYDRA. From his disappearance in 1945 to his return in 2014 were years that seemed to be blank, lost in his memory, years in which he escaped the clutches of the terrorist organisation, fell in love, managed to live a full life, and once again became the Winter Soldier.
Relationships: Howard Stark/Maria Stark, James "Bucky" Barnes & Reader, James "Bucky" Barnes/Original Female Character(s), James "Bucky" Barnes/Reader, original - Relationship
Kudos: 3





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for my spelling and grammatical mistakes, English is not my native language, I am learning.
> 
> My Tumblr: https://ladyeliot.tumblr.com

**2023**

Time is an element that can generate contradictory feelings, in barely a millisecond it can change your life without you even realising it.

His surroundings were full of uncertainty, the foundations he had laid in the years that followed had just cracked, offering him a blank map for his future. Just a few seconds ago his destiny was shared with the person who had saved him from his darkness, from his inner demons, yet that person seemed to have lived a life in which he had not been present.

A few yards away sat an individual on a bench near the lake, his changed appearance suggesting that time had passed over his features, but he had no doubt that it was him. Sam, standing firmly by his side, approached him first, for he himself did not know if he had the courage to face the situation. A brave choice, he thought, as well as a bold one, but always made from the heart, as was everything his old friend did.

A knot formed in his stomach, wondering why the decision had been made, and only the word ‘love’ connected to the name 'Peggy Carter’ came to mind. His eyes glazed over as a shy smile formed at the corners of his lips, prompting him to consider the life Steve had had. His good fortune to be able to return to the past and to have lived with the person he truly loved gave him a sense of well-being filled with anger at himself. It was an opportunity that he had contemplated and wished for during his years of lucidity and which he had firmly recognised was merely impossible.

His hands balled into fists inside his jacket pockets relaxed as he watched Sam, after a few minutes, rise from the bench, inviting him to take his place. Bucky bit the inside of his lower lip nervously as he ducked his head, watching his restless feet. Sam positioned herself next to him, placing her hand on his shoulder, their eyes made a brief connection in which hundreds of words were exchanged, but he knew it would be alright after observing Sam’s relaxed countenance.

A nod to himself and again he formed a fist in his hands and slowly approached the stone bench, where a figure sat with his back to him at all times. Whitish grey hair was visible in his hair, accompanied by a slightly hunched back. They barely looked at each other, for there was so much to express that it was better not to say anything. Their eyes were absorbed in contemplating the horizon reflected in the blue waters of the lake.

The peace in the air slowed Buck’s heartbeat and he let the air out of his lungs with a sigh. Steve kept his hands folded in his lap, the wrinkles expressing the long existence he had had. His friend couldn’t help but turn his gaze slightly towards them, causing a feeling of gratitude to settle over him, for the fact that after so long Steve had returned to them meant so much.

“I have to admit she was a really beautiful woman,” said Steve, causing the silence to break at last. His voice was faint and had changed over the years.

Bucky smiled quizzically as his eyes roamed over the face of his friend, who was still staring straight ahead. His mind recalled with a hint of difficulty the figure of Sergeant Carter, but the fact was that she was blissful in beauty, as well as in ruggedness and courage. Before he could admit it and agree with his partner, however, Steve intervened again.

“I didn’t have the pleasure of knowing her, but she sure was a great woman,” Steve’s blue eyes, over which his expression lines fell, made a connection with Bucky’s, which after hearing those words became impassive.

A lump in his throat formed as his pupils dilated and became watery with the multiple feelings he was feeling. In no instant would she have expected those words to come from Steve. Talking about her out loud, even remembering her in his mind, generated a lot of pain inside him, but the fact that his friend had seen her or knew about her, due to his return to the past, and remembered her after so long was a fact to be thankful for.

Steve didn’t mean Peggy Carter, no, he meant Michelle.

“I couldn’t help it, it wasn’t my duty to do it either” he urged turning back to gaze at the horizon “But you can change the course of your future.”

Steve’s trembling hands parted to pull an object from inside his jacket, Bucky was still at a loss for words but he was paying attention to his old friend’s every gesture. A large white envelope, that was what he pulled out, its size was similar to that of a sheet of paper, however inside it seemed to contain a series of documentation, barely visible due to its opacity. The aged hands handed him the envelope, which James looked at with suspicion and fear of what might be inside it.

“What is this?” a trickle of a voice came from within him, hesitating to ask the question.

“That which will give answers to your many doubts.”

Steve placed his hand on Bucky’s back, trying to comfort him and give him strength to face the path that was about to begin, and that unfortunately he could not be by his side “Now it is your choice. In those documents you will find all the information gathered by SHIELD, from the HYDRA documents to the present day” he turned to his right and picked up a white box. “I suppose you’ll want to have this as well.”

The uncertainty that had been wandering in his mind for the last few years might cease to exist the moment he opened that white packet, but was he really ready to face his greatest fears, those that had kept him from sleeping peacefully for years and that still lay before him when he was awake?

Time seemed to stand still, neither of them uttering another word on the subject at hand, yet their closeness spoke volumes. Bucky’s hand clenched tightly around the envelope, trying to contain all the rage that burned inside him. He hesitated whether to open it now or wait, wait until he had the courage to fight, but he had waited so long for that moment that he decided to open it, releasing his worst fears.

Inside it coexisted a series of documents, gathered in a folder of light blue colour, he extracted it presenting it in front of his own eyes and emphasizing what some red letters informed that it would be its content.

> **“PROJECT LIEUTENANT WELLS - CONFIDENTIAL FILES”**

His jaw closed impassively as his right hand clenched into a fist and he would say it to his lips in an attempt to stop a sob. His eyes closed, for as he himself had predicted, he did not feel up to the task of coping with all that it meant.

Steve, who was watching the situation closely without having taken his hand off his friend’s back, said those words that would always be true: “I’m With You Till The End Of The Line”.


	2. All of you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Little was known about Bucky Barnes’ life under the torment of HYDRA. From his disappearance in 1945 to his return in 2014 were years that seemed to be blank, lost in his memory, years in which he escaped the clutches of the terrorist organisation, fell in love, managed to live a full life, and once again became the Winter Soldier.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for my spelling and grammatical mistakes, English is not my native language, I am learning.
> 
> My Tumblr: https://ladyeliot.tumblr.com

**West Berlin. May 1954**

The mirror showed a reflection you hadn't stopped to contemplate in a long time. Rosy cheeks offered life and warmth to a pale face that seemed to have been forgotten. Your skin was smooth and the colour of porcelain, showing the youth that had just begun. Your eyes were highlighted by a greyish iris, which seemed to be complemented by blue drops, but as pale as your complexion. Your golden hair was tied back behind your face, but even so, a few strands stood up in rebellion, sliding down your forehead.

You moved closer to that imposing mirror, which was perched on the chest of drawers in that hotel room. It was then that you could see on your lips that the reddish lipstick had been fixed to perfection, offering a speck of colour to that ensemble that you formed in your totality. Your attention was diverted to the melody coming from the phonograph's horn, however you could notice the presence of a person behind you reflected in the mirror itself. Those vermilion lips showed a smile, as the warmth of the male body pressed against your back. 

"You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen in my life," the whisper overpowered the music. "Tonight every man in the universe will know how lucky I am."

A blush came over you, causing you to look away from his face through the mirror and lower your gaze, still smiling. It had been a few months since you had left behind everything you had known in your nineteen years, venturing out to suffer the indifference and rejection that the unknown future could bring. Your life in New York was a past that counterbalanced the pain and happiness of your younger years, but it did not offer you all that your inner self demanded, until he came along. Richard was a young British man of beauty, wit and chance, who had made a fortune in the tobacco world after the end of the Second World War. So you could say that it didn't take long for you to notice him and for him to want you among his various properties. It was an accumulation of promises that entered your mind and led you to follow him to Europe without questioning their veracity, accepting the consequences that this meant for a young woman of your position in a world run by and for men. 

It had been many years since you 

had had a male figure to support or guide your decisions, as well as your purpose in life. The loss of your father during the Second World War made you acquire a mind of your own and make decisions of your own, which mostly used to be accepted by your sweet mother, but which in this case did not find a place in the audacity of your friends and family. Those who knew you thought that your judgement had been clouded or that you had only lost your mind because of your love for that gentleman.

Richard had made his appearance in New York City just a few months earlier. Your fates crossed in the New York night, during the presentation of a new Walker Motors Corporation internal combustion engine at the Edison Hotel, a milestone in the market. Richard was an external guest, invited by one of the company's own partners, but you were invited by the leading eminence. It is worth noting that Charles Walker, director of WMC, has been friends with you since your childhood, which is why you attended the private party. However, it was not until midnight that Charles himself took it upon himself to introduce you, alluding that Richard had shown an exclusive interest in meeting you.

"Where is your mind?" Richard's lips brushed your right earlobe.

His fingers rested on your neck and brushed aside a slight lock that fell across your collarbone to rest his lips on it. All the while you watched each of his movements in the mirror.

"I don't want your mind to go elsewhere if I'm not in your thoughts," that whisper sent a shudder around your body, as Richard's lips continued to trail firmly down your neck.

You had been extremely decisive in agreeing to give yourself to a man you barely knew, or had any testimony about his past. But your mind was so dazzled by the hopes you had placed on him and his oaths that you had barely been able to consider the fact that something could go wrong.

The kissing stopped, which caused you to open your eyes again to find your own reflection. Richard turned away from your body for a moment to look inside his jacket. After a few seconds he pulled out a greenish rectangular box, which he opened without letting you see what was inside.

"Close your eyes," the young man asked softly in your ear.

With little opposition you acted as he had instructed. A tingle tingled around your neck, which brought a subtle smile to your lips as you waited for Richard's command to open your eyes again. However, it wasn't until after he placed a brief kiss on your bare shoulder that you decided on your own to contemplate the object resting on your collarbones. Your lips parted in surprise, as an array of pearls lay upon you, illuminating practically the entire room. Your fingers slowly brushed each one of them, you hardly knew what to say, the only thing that came to your mind was the questioning of why about that detail.

"Tonight you will shine over the whole world," Richard's hands rested on your hips. "There won't be anyone in Berlin, east or west, who doesn't know who Michelle Wells is."

You offered him a blushing smile as you stared at your figures in front of the mirror, those words giving you the encouragement you needed to face the performance that was to take place in a few hours.

Your ability on stage had been recognised in various clubs in New York, but you knew that the audience that night could not compare to the one you had had before. New York had been the pinnacle of jazz, and Harlem had been a favourite neighbourhood of its own creation, yet it was a far cry from anything you were used to.

A slight sigh came out of your mouth, showing the presence of your nervousness in such a situation. It was an unavoidable fact of life that you were thousands of miles away from your hometown, and even if you had made yourself think that you and Richard would find your own home, you couldn't help but feel incomplete.

"Take everything out of your mind, leave it blank and just focus on you from this moment on," the breath collided with your ear, creating a brief shiver down your spine. "Forget everything you have lived through, and all the people. You are the creator of your own destiny, and no one can stand in the way of that. Tonight may be the most important moment for your future. For our future."

In that instant you turned around so that you could look directly into his eyes, those that depending on the light could appear blue or green. Under the dimness of the lamp the greenish hue could be found in them, but you barely noticed it because their proximity was cut short when he said those words, melting into a slow, passionate kiss before he left for the club.

**Meanwhile, in East Berlin**

A whitish light flickered faintly above him with each step down the long corridor. The silence was broken by the flickering tinkle and the sordid screams in the distance. The place felt like hell itself. However, if it really was hell, it was not as he had imagined it to be. The mist was pouring out of his nostrils with every exhalation, the cold was bordering on extreme. Yet he was unable to feel it in every part of his body. His gaze was impassive, as his ice-cold eyes seemed to be held in a sea of darkness. The road came to an end as the stiff iron gate cut him off. His footsteps slowed but did not stop, as a dull echo reported the opening of the gate, offering entrance to a new area.

The walls, as sturdy as the material of construction, stone, offered not a hint of light, for there were hardly any openings in them. The place had the characteristics of an underground bunker, with only a musty smell coming from the ceiling. His figure continued his march along the corridor, with a firm and decisive step, knowing where he was going. At that instant, a silhouette loomed on the right side, guarding a new entrance. That silhouette, noticing the presence that was heading towards him, moved away from in front of the door, opening the way for the man, who stopped in front of it until it opened.

"Oh, we've been expecting you, soldier," said a German-accented voice from inside the room.

Unlike the corridor, there was a pleasant warmth in that room for anyone. However, he was no longer a person. The door closed behind him, preventing him from leaving, for he would have to face the four figures sitting at an oval table. One of them rose from his seat and slowly approached him with his hands behind his back, until they were facing each other.

"I believe the orders you have been given are clear soldier," he observed curiously squinting at the young man. "Do you have any doubts?"

"No, sir," a coldness crept into his voice from inside his throat, it seemed as if he had spent the last few months barely expressing a sound through it.

"That's the way I like it," that statement came along with an encouraging look from every part of the young soldier. "Kerkove will be in charge of taking you to the west side of Berlin. There you know what you have to do.”

The soldier merely nodded, processing all the data that had been offered to him hours before. The door opened again to let him out, just as he had entered, and the person in charge of his mission stood there. Over the past months he had carried out a number of other missions on the eastern front, but this was the first time he would be infiltrating the western zone, covered by American and British soldiers, which is why he was wearing an American infantry uniform, similar to that of his companion.

As he arrived outside, he realised that the night was clear, as the moon was in full bloom, a fact that could hinder the key points of the mission. Even so, he had to concentrate, since his first test would be the moment he wanted to cross the border, for although he was in the uniform of the American army, he had to pass himself off as one of them.

Fifteen and a half kilometres was the distance to be covered by car, before walking three kilometres to the point in question. The quietness fell upon him, sharing a constant blank stare, and with nothing else in his thoughts but each and every step to be taken that night. There were hardly any words between the two of them, until the moment they parted, as his companion informed him that they would meet again after four hours at the rendezvous point to carry out their extraction.

The ease with which he found himself in West Berlin in five minutes seemed absurd in the face of so much apparent control over the population itself. The tranquillity received on the other side of the wall caused a rupture in the new area, a commotion was generated as he walked towards the more central streets, entering the Berlin night. The movement of pedestrians and cars caused him to slow his steps, remembering his sense of mission 'To blend in without being discovered'.

The streetlights illuminated the roads and the power of those lights fell on his face, generating a sense of uneasiness in the face of his own passivity. Groups of uniformed men walked along, mingling with the local population. He was curious as to where they were going, for the premises of the busy main street invited him to enter them. Those five soldiers in British uniforms, which he could distinguish by colours and badges, made their way to the pavement in front of him and then entered a place called 'Central Club'.

After looking around, he could not think of a better situation than to take the same path and thus discover their frequent activities. With the proximity to the place, he noticed the melody that could be heard behind the door, which became more and more noticeable after opening it. An unfamiliar smell hit his face as he stepped inside. Warm brown tones met his gaze as did long descending staircases. Hesitantly he descended each step, incorporating the smell of aniseed liqueur into his senses as the notes coming from those instruments became more constant. A greenish curtain gave way to the hall, which was unexpectedly packed with people. Its tables were completely crowded and the noise mixed with the melody hardly let him think in those moments. He looked around as a boy bumped into him trying to get in. His gaze fell on the bar on the right-hand side, intending to sit down and take in the area at his leisure. Nearby he could find an empty stool catching the attention of the bartender himself.

"What will you have?" he asked as he wiped a glass of champagne between his hands "Is this your first time at the Central Club?"

The soldier nodded, half-opening his lips, for he had scarcely noticed his presence.

"Then you must try our special aniseed and ginger cocktail," the waiter began to serve him after watching the boy nod. "I suppose you've come for her, haven't you? We haven't had the club this full since before the war, she's a real gem, I envy the man who gets her."

The soldier paid little attention to his words, but nodded at every comment he offered, for he had not yet been able to adjust to the atmosphere generated by the crowd. Music was still playing on the circular wooden stage in the background. A band was providing entertainment, showing off their merits with a piano, drums, bass and saxophone. However, due to the noise it was impossible to hear them.

He took the glass that the man had prepared for him a few minutes ago and brought it to his lips, making his throat burn with every drop that fell through it. His senses were amplified and the warmth was rising from within him. She turned to the man behind the bar to inform him to refill the glass, for if he was to blend in he hoped to do so as everyone else in the place did.

The music stopped and male words came from the stage. The soldier barely noticed. However, the deafening noise of applause and cheers made him look towards the back of the room. A female figure appeared as if out of nowhere before his very eyes. After she came on stage, silence fell, reminding him of peace. The spotlights created an aura of divinity around the young woman that abstracted any of his own thoughts as soon as he beheld her. Her crimson lips could be glimpsed from every corner of the club, making the blood burn under those uniforms.

Time had stood still for a few moments, for the slowness with which such an event unfolded before his eyes was apparent. The girl slowly brought her fingers around the microphone to bring it closer to her mouth, as she set the rhythm by snapping her fingers to the melody of the bass. That was the moment when the soldier became a man, his reasoning engaged in a constant struggle against his experience. That voice had taken over his thoughts and was the only thing he could hear inside him. The melody had awakened a sliver of his memories, but he had not yet realised that fact. The hole of darkness that made him up had found a flame to illuminate it. 

> “All of me

> Why not take all of me?

> Can't you see?

> I'm no good without you”

His muscles had relaxed as the minutes passed. His lips were parted and his eyes were completely lost in hers. For an instant he thought he could feel their paths meet, holding her gaze, a fact that generated a throbbing in his heart that he did not seem to possess. In a subtle blink of an eye, barely noticing it, the girl finished her song and lost his vision as everyone in the room rose to their feet to applaud her, but he did not. He preferred to keep his gaze lost trying to glimpse what had just happened in those moments, as his mission became present in him again.

"It's a wonder," the bartender interjected. "A woman with a voice like that can't possibly go unnoticed. I think I could listen to her for the rest of my life, and watch her too. You know what I mean."

The soldier just sipped the last of the liquor in his glass and turned his attention back to the group of men in British uniforms who had led him there. They seemed to be in a hurry to leave again, so he took a note from his pocket and without looking back left it on the bar to follow them. From that moment on, his evening was based on analysing each of the places they frequented and the activities they carried out, making the odd brief conversation, and letting himself be seen in the area. He did not have a chance to think about the heady moment he had experienced until he returned to the bunker and was asked for all the information he had collected. However, although a new memory had settled in his mind, he was unable to express his encounter with her.


End file.
